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  1. #1
    Forum Regular tugmcmartin's Avatar
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    Off topic: Life sucks, and: Many thanks guys and gals...

    For the many well wishes extended me last week for the birth of my first child. Mom and son are doing well. We haven't been getting a lot of sleep lately, but it sure has been a joy.

    As for the "life sucks" part of the header, i freaking got fired from my job last monday... a few hours after leaving the office. The prick bosses cited "poor performance" and then went into some bull ****e reasons relating to email and internet usage. Bull ****e because there was no known company policy about what they claimed i was violating. The bosses were doing the same stuff. You know the drill. A little bit of porn (stupid, i know, but i ain't gonna deny it... especially since the boss was sending me porno pics on a regular basis), downloading and uploading songs onto the work computer for listening while working, playing fake poker at an online casino during lunch. Yeah, so as a "Happy Baby" gift they fire me. My pop, who is an attorney in VA whose specialty is employment law, says i could sue 'em and win, but it would cost me ten grand that i don't really have just to get to a judge. Not worth the hassle. So i had to laugh when i saw another subject line "when life hands you lemons". Life has handed me lemons my friends, and i am going to make lemonade! I've decided to pursue a career in carpentry. Something i've wanted to do for a long time. I really enjoy working with my hands and building things and being able to see what you've had a hand in creating. So i'll be taking a huge cut in pay, but i'll be happier for it. Now just need to find a company that'll take me on. Luckily we had been saving for a new house (which ain't gonna happen now) so we have some deccent reserves while i'm unemployed.

    Anyway, thanks for the well wishes on the baby and for letting me vent here. For all you religious types, send up a few prayers for me and the wife and kid so that we'll land on our feet. I'd appreciate it. I'm sure it'll all work itself out, as it always seems to. But the extra stress sure doesn't help much.

    The upside? Aside from doing something i should have done a long time ago by going into carpentry, i'll have more time to hang out here! Although it is on dial-up, so maybe not that often.

    No new music news for me. Too much else going on to worry about it.

    Hope all is well with you folks. Hope to keep checking in and contributing when i can.

    Tug

  2. #2
    Crackhead Extraordinaire Dusty Chalk's Avatar
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    My sincerest condolences -- having to find a new job sucks. I can't even imagine switching careers entirely. Hey, keep in touch, I may need to use your pop myself.
    Eschew fascism.
    Truth Will Out.
    Quote Originally Posted by stevef22
    you guys are crackheads.
    I remain,
    Peter aka Dusty Chalk

  3. #3
    Stainmaster Finch Platte's Avatar
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    Wow.

    Good thing you have that $$ backup goin' on.

    Sounds like you'll be fine- are you in an area that can use carpenters? Man, if you lived near me, you'd have more work than you could shake a stick at- lots of new homes going up (I know, I know) and where I work is hiring (sort of- part time).

    Best of luck to ya. I'm not religious, but good thoughts are floating your way.

    Gary

  4. #4
    Toon Robber tentoze's Avatar
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    Tug,

    Sounds like you've got the right perspective to me- it all gets a little bumpy from time to time. Go for what makes you happy, and enjoy the precious times with your family.

    et
    ----Never Off Topic, Never Rude-----

  5. #5
    all around good guy Jim Clark's Avatar
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    Sorry about the employment situation, sounds like a jacked up company so perhaps things will work out for the best. I wish I had some carpentry skills. Without going into a huge long post concerning my own particular situation I would suggest that it is possible to buy an older, run down house in an average neighborhood and then fix it up for resale. My problem is of course the carpentry aspect but even I can muddle through most of what I encounter. It certainly isn't what I envisioned doing with my life and when our household circumstances change I'd like to think I could step back into the more traditional workplace but for now I can make some money and still be home when the boys aren't in school. I'm certainly not getting rich but I'm doing it on an extremely small scale. At the very least you should at least consider starting your own little handyman company. My plumber/electrician/ac/furnace guy lives in a 350,000 house and trust me, in KC that means something. It's at least worth looking into.

    It's good that you'll have some time to get to know your, son right off the bat and that is a blessing. My prayers go out to you and your family.

    Regards,
    jc
    Last edited by Jim Clark; 03-31-2004 at 06:31 AM.
    "Ahh, cartoons! America's only native art form. I don't count jazz 'cuz it sucks"- Bartholomew J. Simpson

  6. #6
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    Wow.

    Dang dude, I thought I had it tough these days...

    I wish you the best of luck.

    1) Try to remain positive
    2) Keep your self confidence level way up there


    Little Tug sounds like he's doing the good job of keeping you awake!

    Our 2 boys are busy busy busy busy busy. It's amazing how big of a mess a small bottle of baby powder can make.

    You know, it's a 2 sided coin with your gig - they canned a good person, they are the dicks and are still in the crappy ass place, whereas you get a fresh start and can now pursure a career that you like, and that aspect makes a huge impact on your success.

    Go get 'em!

    Dave

  7. #7
    Forum Regular newtrix1's Avatar
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    any chance of collecting unemployment pay?

    I'm not sure what the "rules" are regarding unemployment pay, but maybe your Dad can give you some advice on how to approach your former employee regarding your release from their company. If they laid you off (rather than fired you), you could probably collect unemployment pay. I don't see what difference it would make to them (same results, right?), but it would make a huge difference to you.

    Like you say, it seems like in the long run, this unfortunate event might have some positive results. Glad to hear that the family is all well, that's what really counts!

    For a little levity, go rent the movie "Office Space" and have a few laughs.

  8. #8
    dld
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    Damn Tug, I am really sorry about what happened. Very best wishes for this to turn into lemonade in the very near future. As for the utility of your carpentry skills, there are some real positives to this. You rlocation is a huge help. you're in an area where good skills like htat a appreciated. Plus, you're in a hot economy. The first means nothing without the second.

    Don't know what else I can say that others haven't already said, just good luck, keep hanging here, keep us informed, and enjoy the heck out of Tug Jr.
    Do I have to spell it out?

    C---H---E---E----S----E

    A--N--D

    O---N---I---O---N---S

    Oh No

  9. #9
    Stainmaster Finch Platte's Avatar
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    Office Space, huh?

    Quote Originally Posted by newtrix1

    For a little levity, go rent the movie "Office Space" and have a few laughs.
    I checked the summary out at Djangos- sounds like a pretty good premise. Thanks for the tip. Someone else recommended this, too, so...

    http://www.djangomusic.com/item_movi...21#plotsummary

    fp

  10. #10
    Stone Stone's Avatar
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    First, congrats on the new addition. That's a wonderful thing.

    Second, like someone else already said, it sounds like you have a very good attitude about things. I really think things happen for a reason and I'm sure something great is right around the corner for you. No matter what though, no job or anything like that can compare to your family and your child. Congrats again.

    Stone
    And the world will turn to flowing pink vapor stew.

  11. #11
    Stone Stone's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Finch Platte
    I checked the summary out at Djangos- sounds like a pretty good premise. Thanks for the tip. Someone else recommended this, too, so...

    http://www.djangomusic.com/item_movi...21#plotsummary

    fp
    I'll also recommend it. I was just talking to someone about it yesterday Great show (despite the fact that Jennifer Aniston is in it), when you need/want a laugh.
    And the world will turn to flowing pink vapor stew.

  12. #12
    Forum Regular BarryL's Avatar
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    I Think The Good News More Than Offsets The Bad

    Quote Originally Posted by tugmcmartin
    For the many well wishes extended me last week for the birth of my first child. Mom and son are doing well. We haven't been getting a lot of sleep lately, but it sure has been a joy.

    As for the "life sucks" part of the header, i freaking got fired from my job last monday... a few hours after leaving the office. The prick bosses cited "poor performance" and then went into some bull ****e reasons relating to email and internet usage. Bull ****e because there was no known company policy about what they claimed i was violating. The bosses were doing the same stuff. You know the drill. A little bit of porn (stupid, i know, but i ain't gonna deny it... especially since the boss was sending me porno pics on a regular basis), downloading and uploading songs onto the work computer for listening while working, playing fake poker at an online casino during lunch. Yeah, so as a "Happy Baby" gift they fire me. My pop, who is an attorney in VA whose specialty is employment law, says i could sue 'em and win, but it would cost me ten grand that i don't really have just to get to a judge. Not worth the hassle. So i had to laugh when i saw another subject line "when life hands you lemons". Life has handed me lemons my friends, and i am going to make lemonade! I've decided to pursue a career in carpentry. Something i've wanted to do for a long time. I really enjoy working with my hands and building things and being able to see what you've had a hand in creating. So i'll be taking a huge cut in pay, but i'll be happier for it. Now just need to find a company that'll take me on. Luckily we had been saving for a new house (which ain't gonna happen now) so we have some deccent reserves while i'm unemployed.

    Anyway, thanks for the well wishes on the baby and for letting me vent here. For all you religious types, send up a few prayers for me and the wife and kid so that we'll land on our feet. I'd appreciate it. I'm sure it'll all work itself out, as it always seems to. But the extra stress sure doesn't help much.

    The upside? Aside from doing something i should have done a long time ago by going into carpentry, i'll have more time to hang out here! Although it is on dial-up, so maybe not that often.

    No new music news for me. Too much else going on to worry about it.

    Hope all is well with you folks. Hope to keep checking in and contributing when i can.

    Tug
    Sorry to hear about the sudden shift to the leisured class.

    My first advice is to not just take it. If your boss was sending you porno, sounds like they owe you, so unless you got a good package to leave, at least get a lawyer to write a letter. Most companies settle. It's worth the small investment.

    Second, I can't think of anyone who has been fired or lost their job that, once the dust settles, doesn't in hindsite see it as having been a good thing. It's the suddenness that shocks and hurts, but it sounds like you'll make it all work out. And the number one priority is family.

    As for music, hey, there's plenty on offer around this town.

    Keep up the spirits.

  13. #13
    Close 'n PlayŽ user Troy's Avatar
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    I completely concur with everything Barry said.

    You prolly don't need to do too much to gain a lot of satisfaction against the guys that canned you.

    And yes, it's usually quite strange how this kind of thing will be looked at as positive with a little hindsight.

    And double yes, "Office Space" is one of the best movies of the 90s. I HAD that job. Truly. It's why I work for myself now. That scene where no one wants to sing happy birthday at the bosses party is absolutely classic. That movie belongs in the documentary section, not the comedy section.

  14. #14
    Forum Regular audiobill's Avatar
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    Lemonaid....for sure, Tug....

    Congrats on your newest addition to the family!! I'm a little slow, so that's good new news to me.

    The ba***ds!!
    Take Barry L's advice on the drafted letter. Definitely, worth the while and cost.
    Btw, Carpenters are in very high demand up here in Canada. I'm sure that in the States the sit'n is similar.
    6 mos from now, you'll be happier.......I'm sure of it.

    As for music....let me know how I may be of help (e-mail me) to get you over the purchaseless hump.

    Chin upl,
    Bill aka audiobill

  15. #15
    Dubgazer -Jar-'s Avatar
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    sorry to hear..

    I'm sorry for your job loss, but happy that you'll be happier in your new career path.. I kicked around the idea of becoming a Mason once. (hehe wouldn't that be cool.. Mason the Mason..).. but anyways.. it's great that you have some savings to fall back on.. I don't even want to think about what would happen to me if I lost my job..

    I hope things work out for the best..

    -jar
    If being afraid is a crime we'll hang side-by-side,
    at the swingin' party down the line..


    The Replacements

  16. #16
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    Sorry and Congrats

    I didn't know you were pregnant but I'm glad it went well.

    How ironic is this post? We were in the middle of a lab on Network Monitoring and the teach asked us to go out on the internet as to create traffic on our network. I browsed here and opened your post with no knowledge of what was inside. Of course on the overhead from the teachers PC we could see in real time all the connections internal and external to our subnet. IP address, computer name, website connected to, ect. This is just the tip of the iceburg as to what can be tracked and filtered out of the databse that gets saved. I'm really sorry this happened to you and actually hate that I will need to impliment this invasion of privacy/misuse of company time and resources issue.

    To anyone playing online at work- you can be set up sooooooo easily and right at your local workstation and then the console is locked so you can't get to the places to override the auditing. Be vewwy vewwy careful playing online at work.

    Big Brother is always watching. Not always you they are looking for but you show up in the filtering.

    Hyfi

  17. #17
    Forum Regular wasch_24's Avatar
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    Just keep your chin up brother.

    Your attitude on the whole situation gives you a leg up on the whole deal.

    Hang in there, these days are what memories are made of.

  18. #18
    Forum Regular jack70's Avatar
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    re

    Quote Originally Posted by BarryL
    Second, I can't think of anyone who has been fired or lost their job that, once the dust settles, doesn't in hindsite see it as having been a good thing. It's the suddenness that shocks and hurts, but it sounds like you'll make it all work out. And the number one priority is family.
    100% right. Agree totally with Barry & Troy here.

    I've found myself in that position in my younger days, and I've seen it happen to many others. Many businesses that are showing a slowing of profits, or for other economic reasons simply get rid of people for the financial "savings". It often "feels" personal, but it usually isn't. Bosses (usually someone talking orders from above who doesn't like it any better than you do) will go after someone who's made use of insurance benefits, or some other $-bottom line fact... but they'll never say it, so they come up with some BS thing.

    I've seen people get highly pissed and take it to court... but aside from the costs involved, the mental pressure is usually of a waaaay negative nature... and you'll never "hurt" anyone doing that, although you'll fool yourself into believing it. My advice is put it behind you and move ahead... a "good positive attitude" may sound like typical psycho-babble, but it's really true. Fighting a tar-babby will only get you dirty. Your health will suffer, and nothing good will come of it in the end, even if you "win".

    PS... learning as many trades as possible is valuable. There's always a demand for hard-working people who build things. It's amazing how many people need "things" done... on their car, pipes, yard, electric hookup, etc, and are clueless about such things. I've worked in carpentry, plumbing and electrical work in my younger days. It's much more satisfying in many ways. You also have a smaller "bureaucracy" to deal with in small business than in big companies, where you're just a drone.

    And remember what a famous Greek said... (paraphrasing) - you only get wisdom through suffering. (a little is good for us, even though it hurts at the time)

    Good luck.
    You don't know... jack

  19. #19
    Forum Regular MindGoneHaywire's Avatar
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    Congrats on the birth, sorry to hear about the job...hope that straightens itself out soon. Good luck!

    I don't like others.

  20. #20
    all around good guy Jim Clark's Avatar
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    Oh, you're in luck! I see the Monster.com ad showing up right next to this message box. See, things are looking up already (rolls eyes).

    jc
    "Ahh, cartoons! America's only native art form. I don't count jazz 'cuz it sucks"- Bartholomew J. Simpson

  21. #21
    Rocket Surgeon Swish's Avatar
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    Don't let those rat bastards get away with this!

    I was going to suggest the same thing that Barry mentioned; have an attorney draft a letter advising them about the lack of any policy regarding internet usage and about your boss sending you porno. I think the very thought of having to go to court will make them sit up and take notice. It won't cost you very much and it certainly can't hurt.

    I went through a situation with an employer years ago and, had I known then what I know now, I could have cashed in pretty big. While I wasn't fired, I was passed over for a big promotion by some a-hole who hand-picked a woman with almost no qualifications who was with our company less than 2 years (I was there 9 years and was the top performing manager in the district while she was near the bottom). She was promoted merely because she was a woman and we lacked female managers at that level. Anyway, they did me a favor because I quit within a few months, went into the mortgage business on a commission sales basis and doubled my income within a year.

    Regardless of what happens, I wish you the best of luck with the carpentry and all. Good carpenters in my area are hard to find, although I know one of the best in my area and he makes a very good living, as he should.

    Like Finchy, I'm also not a religious person, but I'll keep a good thought for you, your wife and new baby, and let me know if I can be of any help otherwise.

    Regards,
    Swish
    I call my bathroom Jim instead of John so I can tell people that I go to the Jim first thing every morning.

    If you say the word 'gullible' very slowly it sounds just like oranges.

  22. #22
    Musicaholic Forums Moderator ForeverAutumn's Avatar
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    When life hands you lemons...

    throw them at your damn boss's head!

    I'm with those of the mind to not take this sitting down. You've been wronged. Don't let your company get away with it. See a lawyer and invest in the letter. What can it hurt? Can you prove that your boss was sending you porn? If so, my guess is that he'll be too embarrassed to let this go to court and will settle. And if not, you can always drop the whole issue before you spend ten grand to get to court. Even if you don't want to bring up the boss/porn issue, there was no published internet usage policy so how can they say that you abused a policy that doesn't exist?

    Did they ever tell you that they weren't happy with your performance? I don't know what the labour laws in the US are, but in Canada there are specific steps that need to be taken before you can fire someone for performance issues. You have to tell them, in writing, that their performance is a problem. You have to give them a timeframe in which to improve. You have to provide training or an environment which allows them the chance to improve. Basically, the employer has to have documented proof of a problem. You can't just wake up one morning and decide to fire someone and cite "poor performance". The letter is worth a shot. Face it, at this point you've got nothing to lose and everything to gain by trying.

    I see this as a huge opportunity for you. It's not often that a Dad gets the chance to spend so much time with his new born. Usually that's the Mom's priveledge. I think that this is a wonderful opportunity for you to spend time with your baby, an opportunity that most men don't get. Feel blessed.

    And if getting fired is what it takes to get you off your ass and into a livelihood that you love, like carpentry, then do it. Again, not many people get the chance to make a living at what they love to do.

    Your porn-loving, bastard of a boss has done you a favour! Take the best advantage of the situation that you can.

    And if there's anything I can send you by way of music to tide you over....don't hesitate to ask.

  23. #23
    Bipolar Bingo Enthusiast Chip_B's Avatar
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    Jeez, Tugster...

    I go away for a few weeks and look what happens. I'm happy for you, on both counts. Obviously I'm delighted to hear about your son and know that you and the Missus must be mighty proud. Now you can drive your friends crazy with endless anecdotes about projectile vomiting and toxic diapers...it's the law in 46 states, including Colorado. Anyhoo, congratulations dad.

    As for the job, I'm one of those that believes in the Cosmic Rockshow: when the first band exits it just means the feature act will be hitting the stage shortly. Put another way, when the Big Guy closes one door, he opens another. It's certainly been true in my own experiences.

    My own job situation is incredibly stressful (worked 132 hours from 1-12 March to meet a document delivery deadline for USCENTCOM) and physically, it's taking a major toll. I've been to see more doctors and specialists over the last year than during my entire 22-year USAF career combined--I kid you not. To exacerbate the problem, I, like you, work for idiots who change their tasking more frequently than a weather vane in a tornado. Ginny (Mrs. B) and I have recently begun talking quite seriously about getting off this express train to an early death and finding a quiet little Florida community to settle down in once the kids are grown and out of the house. Just six more endless years to go. Anyway, I'm not being ironic when I say that I'm happy that you're choosing a new direction in spite of having to make the choice unexpectedly.

    The bottomline is that you'll be fine. You have all the motivation you need right there under your roof.

    Oh, and I'll include you and your family in my prayers.

    -Chip
    "The Blues ain't nothin' but a good man feelin' bad"

    -Willie Brown

  24. #24
    Forum Regular JDaniel's Avatar
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    Whoa Tug, I missed the baby announcement

    Geez man, sorry I missed the announcement on the baby. I was gone all last week with the family on spring break, and didn't scroll back through the posts. That is awesome news. Post a pic (or maybe you have and I just need to check). Ours is due in July, so we are getting closer.


    The job thing is a bummer. But your attitude is right - go make the best of this. Doing something you love is much more important than a higher paying job IMHO. Hang in there bro. I'll say one up for you.

    And don't worry about the music. I'll help out on that front. Email me your home email and snail mail addys. I'm at holtdadATbellsouth.net.

    JD

  25. #25
    Forum Regular Whooptee's Avatar
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    Dam Tug!

    Congrats on the new arrival.

    The loss of a job always sucks. I'll bet it turns out to be a good thing though, as others have said. I had my own software business for many years. I was forced to close it a few years back. Since then I've made a living doing several different things. Mostly I've done computer service work through a classified ad in the paper. I've just started trying to do some other things that I hope will make me a little more money, because I've just barely been scraping by with the computer work. I'm building some furniture and hopefully I can sell it. And like Jim Clark, I'm fixing up my current house and hope to sell it for a profit and then buy another to do the same. I'm not sure if this is all going to work out, but for the time being it beats the hell out of any other job I've ever had and if a good job presents itself, I can take it with no problem and continue some of this other stuff on the side.

    My dad and granddad were both carpenters. In fact my dad had a really good corporate job for a Fortune 500 company when he decided he wanted to do something else. He started building houses. My grandpa acted as a mentor for my dad and taught him the ins and outs of construction. We did pretty much everthing carpentry-wise on the first several houses, and then later he settled in to doing the trim carpentry and building the decks. So, I think you should go for it and I wish you luck and hope that you're very happy doing it.

    John

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