News Flash: Flyers get screwed in Montreal.

[Swish]

Welcome to the new, obstruction-free NHL. I know an old timer like you who probably played a few games sans headgear doesn't think much of the new rules, but the reduction of clutching and grabbing and tripping is good for the game...

...and let's set the record straight on the "highstick".It's a measure of safety as well as height---the height of the guy holding the stick not the delicate character between the pipes or the svelte figure skating d-man. It's not the Habs' fault they're so much more physically imposing than the "Broad Street Ballerinas".

Don't worry though, word is they're about to give Eric Lindros 17 mil a year to come out of retirement and center the new "Legion of Poon" line with Mayor Nutter and Rosie O'Donnell.

I'll meet ya down at the corner of Market and 61st for my asskicking. I'll be the one with the facepaint and the midgets.

...when the zebra is standing right near the play and your shoulder hits the player with the puck, that's not tripping. Sorry.

The Habs are more physically imposing? Nah, I don't buy it. You're a funny guy, but those two calls were even funnier...and contain a certain stench that smells like 'we can't let the #1 seed lose at home'. High sticking is now considered anything above 4 feet, which is the height of the cross-bar. Replays from behind the net show the stick making contact with the puck above the cross-bar. No goal. Period.

Swish