View Poll Results: Worst Movie Ever Made...Ever...

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  • JAWS: THE REVENGE (1987) I'm Michael Caaaine

    1 20.00%
  • CAN'T STOP THE MUSIC (1980) How did the world live before this film?

    0 0%
  • TEEN WOLF TOO (1987) Such a clever title, get it "too" instead of "two".

    1 20.00%
  • GIGLI (2003) Did anyone actually survive this film?

    0 0%
  • GLITTER (2001) Mariah's breakdown period.

    1 20.00%
  • YOU GOT SERVED (2004) South Park anyone??

    0 0%
  • FROM JUSTIN TO KELLY (2003) ........ uh .....

    1 20.00%
  • SWEPT AWAY (2002) Keep on sweeping it away from me!

    0 0%
  • KAZAAM (1996) It's Shaq time!

    1 20.00%
  • SUBURBAN COMMANDO (1991) It's Hulk time!

    0 0%
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  1. #1
    Suspended PeruvianSkies's Avatar
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    Worst Film Ever Made...

    These are 10 films that (in my experience) were the most dreadful...

    Vote for yours or submit your own worst movie candidate.

  2. #2
    Class of the clown GMichael's Avatar
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    Bolero (1984) - Bo Derek plays a virgin (yeah, right) who can't find a guy willing to pluck her womanhood. I fell asleep.
    WARNING! - The Surgeon General has determined that, time spent listening to music is not deducted from one's lifespan.

  3. #3
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    I voted for Jaws, because fortunately that's the only one listed that I had the misfortune of seeing. Both Exorsist "sequels" rank right up there, and even though Borat got accolades in some circles, I didn't find the humor. In fact, that scene, I think you know the one I mean, was just gross.I DID NOT need to see them two like that! :barf:

  4. #4
    Loving This kexodusc's Avatar
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    Wing Commander
    Battlefield Earth
    A History of Violence
    Freddy Got Fingered
    Being John Malkovich
    Knock-off
    Larry The Cable Guy: Health Inspector
    Pet Cemetery 2
    Sleepwalkers
    Suburbia
    Iron Eagle 2

  5. #5
    JSE
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rich-n-Texas
    I voted for Jaws, because fortunately that's the only one listed that I had the misfortune of seeing. Both Exorsist "sequels" rank right up there, and even though Borat got accolades in some circles, I didn't find the humor. In fact, that scene, I think you know the one I mean, was just gross.I DID NOT need to see them two like that! :barf:

    I'm with you on Borat. While I did find some parts fairly funny, I just did not get what the big deal was. I went in expecting a lot more. And this from a guy who loves the Jackass movies!

  6. #6
    Suspended PeruvianSkies's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by kexodusc
    Wing Commander
    Battlefield Earth
    A History of Violence
    Freddy Got Fingered
    Being John Malkovich
    Knock-off
    Larry The Cable Guy: Health Inspector
    Pet Cemetery 2
    Sleepwalkers
    Suburbia
    Iron Eagle 2
    Great list, but I would have to disagree wholeheartedly with two of your choices: A HISTORY OF VIOLENCE and BEING JOHN MALKOVICH. I thought that David Cronenberg's A HISTORY OF VIOLENCE was a daring and interesting film that broke some of the conventional norms of recent filmmaking and films about revenge. I know that some people are not as big of fans with unconventional filmmaking and especially Cronenberg's knack for odd dark humor with the grisly killing. BEING JOHN MALKOVICH, on the other hand, is Spike Jonze at his best and I thought that ADAPTATION was also a great follow-up, that again, some people are not big fans of, but it's meant for more acquired tastes, especially for people that are more interested in the auteur filmmaking styles.

  7. #7
    Close 'n Play® user Troy's Avatar
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    It says a lot about a person as to what they think the WORST FILM EVER MADE is.

    I mean, Borat? Being John Malkovich? Both films are genius in their own way. I can certainly see not liking them if they rub your sensibilities the wrong way, but all time worst? Surely you've seen WORSE movies than those?

    I suppose someone actually liked "Bicentennial Man" and "Patch Adams" too.

    There's a great piece on directors of bad movies at The Onion right now called "10 Directors You Didn't Know You Hated." Interesting because while most movie fans all know the Coen Brothers movies or PT Anderson movies, no one thinks to follow the careers of these deadbeats making whole strings of truly awful movies.

    http://www.avclub.com/content/featur..._directors_you

  8. #8
    Musicaholic Forums Moderator ForeverAutumn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PeruvianSkies
    BEING JOHN MALKOVICH, on the other hand, is Spike Jonze at his best and I thought that ADAPTATION was also a great follow-up, that again, some people are not big fans of, but it's meant for more acquired tastes, especially for people that are more interested in the auteur filmmaking styles.
    I second that opinion. I loved both of those movies.

    Worst movie ever made IMO is Notting Hill. I watched it while on a flight home from Vegas. As boring as any flight is, this one was actually painfully so. If the flight had gone down, it would have been a relief. Serves me right for starting to watch it anyway. But you're on a plane, you're trapped. Wataya gonna do?

  9. #9
    Shostakovich fan Feanor's Avatar
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    I'm blessed

    Quote Originally Posted by PeruvianSkies
    These are 10 films that (in my experience) were the most dreadful...

    Vote for yours or submit your own worst movie candidate.
    PS,

    Something tells me I'm really lucky to have seen none on your list.

  10. #10
    Shostakovich fan Feanor's Avatar
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    Oh!

    Quote Originally Posted by kexodusc
    Wing Commander
    Battlefield Earth
    A History of Violence
    Freddy Got Fingered
    Being John Malkovich
    Knock-off
    Larry The Cable Guy: Health Inspector
    Pet Cemetery 2
    Sleepwalkers
    Suburbia
    Iron Eagle 2
    I'm doing really well. PS and Kex, and I'm 0 for 20.

  11. #11
    Loving This kexodusc's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Troy
    It says a lot about a person as to what they think the WORST FILM EVER MADE is.

    I mean, Borat? Being John Malkovich? Both films are genius in their own way. I can certainly see not liking them if they rub your sensibilities the wrong way, but all time worst? Surely you've seen WORSE movies than those?
    All depends on your criteria - I've seen some brutal student-directed movies...some made for TV stuff is pretty aweful. They may be equally as uninteresting, except I have less exectations for those so I don't rank them as poorly. It's my list I'll rank them as I wish. Deal with it.

    I guess if we trivialize the term genius like that, every movie is genius in its own way.

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Troy
    It says a lot about a person as to what they think the WORST FILM EVER MADE is.

    I mean, Borat? Being John Malkovich? Both films are genius in their own way. I can certainly see not liking them if they rub your sensibilities the wrong way, but all time worst? Surely you've seen WORSE movies than those?
    So what does it tell you about a person who doesn't like Borat? I don't see anything "genius" about a scene in a movie where two men, who under no circumstances should be seen fighting with each other while naked, would qualify with the high honors you give it, but that's just my opinion. I regret having paid to see it.

    But I would also disagree about Being John... I found it unique and interesting.

  13. #13
    Suspended Smokey's Avatar
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    This might not be the worst movie, but it is certainly most disappointing. Especially from director Steven Spielberg.

    I let you guess


  14. #14
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    My vote goes to "Deep Water". In 50 years of movie watching, this is the most mindless, plotless, derivative excuse of a flick that I have ever had the displeasure of viewing. I don't know who's wannabe actor relatives were thrown a bone, or why, but this abomination should never have made it to the big screen. At best, this would be a grade "C" high school project.
    Last edited by RoyY51; 06-27-2007 at 06:19 PM.

  15. #15
    JSE
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    Quote Originally Posted by RoyY51
    My vote goes to "Deep Water". In 50 years of movie watching, this is the most mindless, plotless, derivative excuse of a flick that I have ever had the displeasure of viewing. I don't know who's wannabe actor relatives were thrown a bone, or why, but this abomination should never have made it to the big screen. At best, this would be a grade "C" high school project.

    And what about Open Water? My god that sucked! Some people loved it. Not sure why though. They got left at sea, the floated around for a while, got eaten by sharks. No suprise, not scary, no suspense, no good. Bleeeeeck!

    JSE

  16. #16
    Suspended PeruvianSkies's Avatar
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    Open Water...

    The thing about the film OPEN WATER is that it's based on a true story that no one knows the end of. The film depicts what 'probably' happened to a couple and is a fairly realistic portrayal of such. Here is the problem though: it's not Hollywood enough for most people. The truth of the matter is that the real story is not always that interesting or entertaining and therefore doesn't always make for a good film. While watching it if you wanted to see more action happening than chances are you were watching it with a different intention to begin with. If you wanted to see a Jaws-like shark jump out of the water and attack them, than you were misguided all along. This isn't a horror film, it's more like a docudrama.

  17. #17
    Man of the People Forums Moderator bobsticks's Avatar
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    Having instinctively avoided most of the above titles I'm not qualified to vote in this one. I would add, however, the 2002 non-epic Insomnia. What dreck. Ny the end of the film I just wanted someone--anyone--to die just to get it over with.

    Actually, it's a pretty good cure for its namesake. Maybe not the worst ever but in the ballpark.

  18. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by JSE
    And what about Open Water? My god that sucked! Some people loved it. Not sure why though. They got left at sea, the floated around for a while, got eaten by sharks. No suprise, not scary, no suspense, no good. Bleeeeeck!

    JSE
    My bad; I meant to say "Open Water" instead of "Deep Water". These damned "senior moments" are coming more rapidly these days. What were we talking about?

  19. #19
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    That's okay RoyY51. That was a GREAT rant no matter what. Ebert and Roper ain't got nothing on you!

  20. #20
    Suspended PeruvianSkies's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bobsticks
    Having instinctively avoided most of the above titles I'm not qualified to vote in this one. I would add, however, the 2002 non-epic Insomnia. What dreck. Ny the end of the film I just wanted someone--anyone--to die just to get it over with.

    Actually, it's a pretty good cure for its namesake. Maybe not the worst ever but in the ballpark.
    Which is exactly what makes this Americanized version of the 1997 Norwegian film INSOMNIA starring Stellan Skarsgard is inferior. In the original 1997 film the main character dies and is a far more interesting film, plus it takes place in the 'land of the midnight sun'. Very cool.

  21. #21
    JSE
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    Quote Originally Posted by PeruvianSkies
    The thing about the film OPEN WATER is that it's based on a true story that no one knows the end of. The film depicts what 'probably' happened to a couple and is a fairly realistic portrayal of such. Here is the problem though: it's not Hollywood enough for most people. The truth of the matter is that the real story is not always that interesting or entertaining and therefore doesn't always make for a good film. While watching it if you wanted to see more action happening than chances are you were watching it with a different intention to begin with. If you wanted to see a Jaws-like shark jump out of the water and attack them, than you were misguided all along. This isn't a horror film, it's more like a docudrama.

    I know what it was supposed to be, it just flat out sucked!

    JSE

  22. #22
    JSE
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    Quote Originally Posted by RoyY51
    My bad; I meant to say "Open Water" instead of "Deep Water". These damned "senior moments" are coming more rapidly these days. What were we talking about?

    Hah! That's funny, I read Deep Water and in my head I was thinking, Dark Water. BTW, Dark Water sucked as well. Tooooo many damn water movies!

    My head hurts now.

    JSE

  23. #23
    Class of the clown GMichael's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JSE
    Hah! That's funny, I read Deep Water and in my head I was thinking, Dark Water. BTW, Dark Water sucked as well. Tooooo many damn water movies!

    My head hurts now.

    JSE
    Water World burn out?
    WARNING! - The Surgeon General has determined that, time spent listening to music is not deducted from one's lifespan.

  24. #24
    Close 'n Play® user Troy's Avatar
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    The Postman

  25. #25
    Big science. Hallelujah. noddin0ff's Avatar
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    Waterworld. A colossal waste. I paid $1.50 to see this at a matinée when it was in the theaters. I still want my money back. I probably wouldn't have minded paying $0.50 for the glimpse of Jeanne Tripplehorn's butt. Unfortunately, she used a body double so I feel cheated there too.

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