Worst Film Ever Made...

[PeruvianSkies]

These are 10 films that (in my experience) were the most dreadful...

Vote for yours or submit your own worst movie candidate.

[GMichael]

Bolero (1984) - Bo Derek plays a virgin (yeah, right) who can't find a guy willing to pluck her womanhood. I fell asleep.

[Rich-n-Texas]

I voted for Jaws, because fortunately that's the only one listed that I had the misfortune of seeing. Both Exorsist "sequels" rank right up there, and even though Borat got accolades in some circles, I didn't find the humor. In fact, that scene, I think you know the one I mean, was just gross.I DID NOT need to see them two like that! :barf:

[JSE]

I voted for Jaws, because fortunately that's the only one listed that I had the misfortune of seeing. Both Exorsist "sequels" rank right up there, and even though Borat got accolades in some circles, I didn't find the humor. In fact, that scene, I think you know the one I mean, was just gross.I DID NOT need to see them two like that! :barf:

I'm with you on Borat. While I did find some parts fairly funny, I just did not get what the big deal was. I went in expecting a lot more. And this from a guy who loves the Jackass movies!

[kexodusc]

Wing Commander
Battlefield Earth
A History of Violence
Freddy Got Fingered
Being John Malkovich
Knock-off
Larry The Cable Guy: Health Inspector
Pet Cemetery 2
Sleepwalkers
Suburbia
Iron Eagle 2

[PeruvianSkies]

Wing Commander
Battlefield Earth
A History of Violence
Freddy Got Fingered
Being John Malkovich
Knock-off
Larry The Cable Guy: Health Inspector
Pet Cemetery 2
Sleepwalkers
Suburbia
Iron Eagle 2

Great list, but I would have to disagree wholeheartedly with two of your choices: A HISTORY OF VIOLENCE and BEING JOHN MALKOVICH. I thought that David Cronenberg's A HISTORY OF VIOLENCE was a daring and interesting film that broke some of the conventional norms of recent filmmaking and films about revenge. I know that some people are not as big of fans with unconventional filmmaking and especially Cronenberg's knack for odd dark humor with the grisly killing. BEING JOHN MALKOVICH, on the other hand, is Spike Jonze at his best and I thought that ADAPTATION was also a great follow-up, that again, some people are not big fans of, but it's meant for more acquired tastes, especially for people that are more interested in the auteur filmmaking styles.

[Troy]

It says a lot about a person as to what they think the WORST FILM EVER MADE is.

I mean, Borat? Being John Malkovich? Both films are genius in their own way. I can certainly see not liking them if they rub your sensibilities the wrong way, but all time worst? Surely you've seen WORSE movies than those?

I suppose someone actually liked "Bicentennial Man" and "Patch Adams" too.

There's a great piece on directors of bad movies at The Onion right now called "10 Directors You Didn't Know You Hated." Interesting because while most movie fans all know the Coen Brothers movies or PT Anderson movies, no one thinks to follow the careers of these deadbeats making whole strings of truly awful movies.

http://www.avclub.com/content/featur..._directors_you

[kexodusc]

It says a lot about a person as to what they think the WORST FILM EVER MADE is.

I mean, Borat? Being John Malkovich? Both films are genius in their own way. I can certainly see not liking them if they rub your sensibilities the wrong way, but all time worst? Surely you've seen WORSE movies than those?

All depends on your criteria - I've seen some brutal student-directed movies...some made for TV stuff is pretty aweful. They may be equally as uninteresting, except I have less exectations for those so I don't rank them as poorly. It's my list I'll rank them as I wish. Deal with it.

I guess if we trivialize the term genius like that, every movie is genius in its own way.

[Rich-n-Texas]

It says a lot about a person as to what they think the WORST FILM EVER MADE is.

I mean, Borat? Being John Malkovich? Both films are genius in their own way. I can certainly see not liking them if they rub your sensibilities the wrong way, but all time worst? Surely you've seen WORSE movies than those?

So what does it tell you about a person who doesn't like Borat? I don't see anything "genius" about a scene in a movie where two men, who under no circumstances should be seen fighting with each other while naked, would qualify with the high honors you give it, but that's just my opinion. I regret having paid to see it.

But I would also disagree about Being John... I found it unique and interesting.

[Smokey]

This might not be the worst movie, but it is certainly most disappointing. Especially from director Steven Spielberg.

I let you guess

[RoyY51]

My vote goes to "Deep Water". In 50 years of movie watching, this is the most mindless, plotless, derivative excuse of a flick that I have ever had the displeasure of viewing. I don't know who's wannabe actor relatives were thrown a bone, or why, but this abomination should never have made it to the big screen. At best, this would be a grade "C" high school project.

[ForeverAutumn]

BEING JOHN MALKOVICH, on the other hand, is Spike Jonze at his best and I thought that ADAPTATION was also a great follow-up, that again, some people are not big fans of, but it's meant for more acquired tastes, especially for people that are more interested in the auteur filmmaking styles.

I second that opinion. I loved both of those movies.

Worst movie ever made IMO is Notting Hill. I watched it while on a flight home from Vegas. As boring as any flight is, this one was actually painfully so. If the flight had gone down, it would have been a relief. Serves me right for starting to watch it anyway. But you're on a plane, you're trapped. Wataya gonna do?

[Feanor]

Wing Commander
Battlefield Earth
A History of Violence
Freddy Got Fingered
Being John Malkovich
Knock-off
Larry The Cable Guy: Health Inspector
Pet Cemetery 2
Sleepwalkers
Suburbia
Iron Eagle 2

I'm doing really well. PS and Kex, and I'm 0 for 20.

[Feanor]

These are 10 films that (in my experience) were the most dreadful...

Vote for yours or submit your own worst movie candidate.

PS,

Something tells me I'm really lucky to have seen none on your list.

[Rich-n-Texas]

That's okay RoyY51. That was a GREAT rant no matter what. Ebert and Roper ain't got nothing on you!

[RoyY51]

That's okay RoyY51. That was a GREAT rant no matter what. Ebert and Roper ain't got nothing on you!

Thanks for the compliment, but the sad truth is that I probably stole the phraseology from Ebert or Roper or someone, and just can't remember doing so. I seem to recall that I'm not a very good writer, so this is probably what happened.

Is it time for my nap, yet?

[GMichael]

Thanks for the compliment, but the sad truth is that I probably stole the phraseology from Ebert or Roper or someone, and just can't remember doing so. I seem to recall that I'm not a very good writer, so this is probably what happened.

Is it time for my nap, yet?

You missed your nap time for today. You'll have to wait 'till tomorrow.

[RoyY51]

You missed your nap time for today. You'll have to wait 'till tomorrow.

Thank you.

Have you seen my glasses? Oh...never mind.

[noddin0ff]

Waterworld. A colossal waste. I paid $1.50 to see this at a matinée when it was in the theaters. I still want my money back. I probably wouldn't have minded paying $0.50 for the glimpse of Jeanne Tripplehorn's butt. Unfortunately, she used a body double so I feel cheated there too.

[L.J.]

You know, I don't think I've seen any of those listed for the vote. From Justin to Kelly.....people actually paid money to see that crap

My wife and I rented Open Water while on vacation and we were highly disappointed. It costed us $12 freakin' dollars

[SlumpBuster]

Alot of the movies listed so far aren't really all that bad. They either succeed on at least one level, or are just drek (sp?), or are not your particular cup of tea, or don't pretent to be anything more than they are. For example, Teen Wolf Too (along with all the other sequels) is just a straight cash grab sequel, not deserving of the title "most" anything. Freddy Got Fingered actually succeeds as an "anti-humor anti-movie" the likes of Anus McGillicuty (or at least some people think so - me included). Battlefield Earth was simply a vanity project. A further example: you can't call Kung Pow: Enter the Fist the worst movie ever made because it wasn't really trying to be any good.

No, to be truely the worst movie ever made, it has to be serious in its endeavor. If it is a comedy, it has to be reach for universal humor but fall flat. If it a drama, it must only achieve melodrama (or audiences laughing at serious actors hamming it up a la Star Wars Ep III).

Accordingly, the worst movie ever made is: Soul Man


This movie is wholly indefensible for so many reasons. Most obviously is the blackface makeup that C. Thomas Howell wears. I can't actually believe that this movie was made in 1986. Frankly, if this movie had been in an earlier time, I would not label it as the Worst of All Time. But, timing is everything.

This was a serious studio picture that starred serious actors. Lets not forget, C. Thomas was poised as one of the next great actors (he starred in Coppala's Outsiders with Tom Cruise as second banana). But Tom Cruise starred in Top Gun in 1986 and C. Thomas starred in Soul Man 1986. What a career killer.

It is not dramatic - though it tries, it is not funny - though it tries.

This movie demonstrates the difference between jokes about racism and racist jokes. Compare this movie with the scene from Silver Streak where Gene Wilder is in black face. That is a scene that works as one of the funniest in movie history because it is a joke about race and racism. The blackface joke of Soul Man is just racist. Gene Wilder is funny because he will fool no one, Soul Man is racist because he fools everyone.

Edit: It costed the actors and audience alike their dignity.

[PeruvianSkies]

Alot of the movies listed so far aren't really all that bad. They either succeed on at least one level, or are just drek (sp?), or are not your particular cup of tea, or don't pretent to be anything more than they are. For example, Teen Wolf Too (along with all the other sequels) is just a straight cash grab sequel, not deserving of the title "most" anything. Freddy Got Fingered actually succeeds as an "anti-humor anti-movie" the likes of Anus McGillicuty (or at least some people think so - me included). Battlefield Earth was simply a vanity project. A further example: you can't call Kung Pow: Enter the Fist the worst movie ever made because it wasn't really trying to be any good.

No, to be truely the worst movie ever made, it has to be serious in its endeavor. If it is a comedy, it has to be reach for universal humor but fall flat. If it a drama, it must only achieve melodrama (or audiences laughing at serious actors hamming it up a la Star Wars Ep III).

Accordingly, the worst movie ever made is: Soul Man


This movie is wholly indefensible for so many reasons. Most obviously is the blackface makeup that C. Thomas Howell wears. I can't actually believe that this movie was made in 1986. Frankly, if this movie had been in an earlier time, I would not label it as the Worst of All Time. But, timing is everything.

This was a serious studio picture that starred serious actors. Lets not forget, C. Thomas was poised as one of the next great actors (he starred in Coppala's Outsiders with Tom Cruise as second banana). But Tom Cruise starred in Top Gun in 1986 and C. Thomas starred in Soul Man 1986. What a career killer.

It is not dramatic - though it tries, it is not funny - though it tries.

This movie demonstrates the difference between jokes about racism and racist jokes. Compare this movie with the scene from Silver Streak where Gene Wilder is in black face. That is a scene that works as one of the funniest in movie history because it is a joke about race and racism. The blackface joke of Soul Man is just racist. Gene Wilder is funny because he will fool no one, Soul Man is racist because he fools everyone.

Edit: It costed the actors and audience alike their dignity.

Thanks for the education on how to run the thread that I started.

[SlumpBuster]

Thanks for the education on how to run the thread that I started.

Your welcome. Somebody has to keep this place high class.

Hopefully your just goofing. If not, I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to hi-jack your thread, but merely outlining the criteria I used to render my conclusion.

But, in my defense. A) none of us have any business seeing a movie like Kazzam, we should all know better. B) of all the movies cited as worst so far, only one to my knowlege contains blackface, in an unironic context too.... so tell me again how my selection is wrong?

[Groundbeef]

Has this ever happened to you guys? My wife and I rented this 'thriller' detective movie starring James Belushi as some washed up detective. Total Snore fest, and it would make the list if I could remember the movie name.

Heres the rub, the box art was SO good, and the writup on the back was excellent. So good that several months later we RENTED it again......watched about 5 minutes and I had this horrible feeling of deja-vu. My wife and I then realized that we had already rented this piece of crap. At this point, what could we do? I couldn't take it back to the movie store and complain about how I hated this movie that I had now rented TWICE. We laughed pretty hard about that one, and still do on occasion.

So we turned it off, and played cards as memory serves.

So if you find an old late 1990's detective movie starring James Belushi, stay away.

[noddin0ff]

OK, no offense intended to you personally L.J. ...but 'costed' ?

costed is a word but that's not what it means or how you use it. You mean 'cost'.

I'm on a mini rant because I've seen and heard it used too many times this week by people who should know better. Sorry for choosing your post to vent on. I’ll go climb back in my box now.