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Thread: Main Event!

  1. #1
    Can a crooner get a gig? dean_martin's Avatar
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    Main Event!

    This forum opened up just in time to put an end to the highly personal, often dirty and under-handed, rip-roarin' all-out war between Florian and RGA! Let's throw them in the steel cage for a no-holds-barred grudge match. To appeal to our potential PPV audience, we need an entertaining undercard and some hot babes! Any ideas on a preliminary bout? How about Da Worfster vs. the entire fave films board Star Wars Ep.III fanclub?

    In the meantime, I invite RGA and Flo to our press conference and weigh-in held right here where they can exchange baiting insults regarding each other's manhood and each other's moma.

    LET'S GET IT ON!

    The Don King Productions Promo:

    "America is the greatest country in the world. Where else could a Canadian student in debt to his eyeballs with student loans and a jet-setting European - the James Bond of audio - settle their differences for a pay-day worth millions? America is the only forum in the world to offer such an oppurtunity! You don't want to miss this. All your friends and relatives will be watching."

  2. #2
    Suspended topspeed's Avatar
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    Cool, ringside seats! Where's the beer?

  3. #3
    Loving This kexodusc's Avatar
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    How much does RGA pay-off?

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    Class of the clown GMichael's Avatar
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    Red face

    Can't we all just get along?

    OK OK, pass me a beer too. Got any chips?
    WARNING! - The Surgeon General has determined that, time spent listening to music is not deducted from one's lifespan.

  5. #5
    JSE
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    I just called my Bookie. He gave me 4 to 1 on RGA.

    Personally, I don't think Florian has the endurance of RGA in the long run. Have you seen some of RGA novels, I mean responses?

    Beer Me!

    JSE

  6. #6
    BooBs are elitist jerks shokhead's Avatar
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    They must be shy.
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  7. #7
    Can a crooner get a gig? dean_martin's Avatar
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    HBO PPV presents what is shaping up to be the fight of the year. Take note as HBO's award winning boxing commentators preview this monumental matchup.

    Jim Lampley: Good evening. We are here live in Las Vegas covering preparations for the upcoming fight between European golden-eared Florian and broke-ass RGA. This week we've learned that broke-ass has been secretely training with the notorious Peter Q. Petey does not mince words. A bomb went off when it finally came out this week that he was training broke-ass. He said, and I quote, "There hasn't been a decent competitor in this sport for 40 years, until now", referring of course to RGA. Needless to say, Golden Ear was offended and he fired back. At this time, I want to bring in my colleague Roy Jones, Jr. who's been covering Florian's training camp.

    Roy Jones, Jr.: Thank you, Jim. For this fight, Florian has gone back to his roots. We all remember that Flo is decended from royalty. He used to fight under the name Lord Magnepan, but then he became ashamed of his heritage and attempted to distance himself from it. Well...I have learned that assisting Florian, who now fights under the name Golden-Ear, in his corner for this fight will be none other than a custom-built 12ft pair of Magneplanar speakers.

    Jim Lampley: But Roy -- shouldn't Golden-ear pull those Maggies out from his corner a little so they can open up and breath?

    Roy Jones, Jr.: Huh?

    Jim Lampley: Nevermind. Tell us Roy, what did Golden-ear think of Peter Q's comments?

    Roy Jones, Jr.: Well Jim, he didn't like'em. (Long pause.) Oh, Flo shot back with something about crushing broke-ass like rotten particle board.

    Jim Lampley: At this time I would like to bring in the third member of our crew, my esteemed colleague Larry Merchant.

    Larry Merchant: Thank you Jim.

    Jim Lampley: Larry, what are your thoughts on this upcoming fight?

    Larry Merchant: Well Jim....................as that old cliche goes....................styles make the fight...............This match-up reminds me of.....................those great cable wars of the past, where..............................one fighter....................

    Jim Lampley: That's all the time we have. For Roy Jones and Larry Merchant and myself, we'll see you at the fight. Good night.

    Larry Merchant: ............................................

  8. #8
    cam
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    I've had 3 beers and I'm on my second rye and coke, I sure hope the main event happens soon or I may be too pissed to follow. I like both of them but I have to back up a fellow Canadian. Come on Rga, you got 33 million people behind you. If Flo gets you in a corner and you think you might be hitting the canvas, I've got some advice for you, type like you have never typed before, Flo may eventually wither from all the long winded jabs and power punches. Remember, throw a type followed by a combination of types and then finish him off with a flury of types. Now get typing. DING DING!

  9. #9
    BooBs are elitist jerks shokhead's Avatar
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    Rye and coke. I dont do those but have one for me.
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  10. #10
    Can a crooner get a gig? dean_martin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cam
    I've had 3 beers and I'm on my second rye and coke, I sure hope the main event happens soon or I may be too pissed to follow.
    RGA is raising money for his bus ticket to Vegas - mail your contributions to SoundHounds. Unfortunately his credit card is maxed out.

    Flo is presently fueling his private jet.

  11. #11
    Class of the clown GMichael's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dean_martin
    RGA is raising money for his bus ticket to Vegas - mail your contributions to SoundHounds. Unfortunately his credit card is maxed out.

    Flo is presently fueling his private jet.
    I've been sitting here drinking for months now. Chips & beer, & beer & chips. The cleaning crue has been in, out, in again & again & again... When does the show start? What the f.k?! Am I at the wrong stadium?
    Last edited by GMichael; 09-16-2005 at 08:23 AM.
    WARNING! - The Surgeon General has determined that, time spent listening to music is not deducted from one's lifespan.

  12. #12
    Can a crooner get a gig? dean_martin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by GMichael
    I've been sitting here drinking for months now. Chips & beer, & beer & chips. The cleaning crue has been in, out, in again & again & again... When does the show start? What the f.k?! Am I at the wrong stadium?
    Sorry you didn't get the news, GM. The fight was cancelled. RGA and Flo decided that talking behind each other's back was safer.

    I'm also sorry to inform you that the time period for ticket refunds has expired. You were supposed to send your tickets back twice with a 3 page typed letter explaining why you bought them in the first place, then call 14 days later and sing the national anthems of both fighters before we would even consider refunding your money.

    We are very pleased that you enjoyed the chips and beer.

  13. #13
    Class of the clown GMichael's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dean_martin
    Sorry you didn't get the news, GM. The fight was cancelled. RGA and Flo decided that talking behind each other's back was safer.

    I'm also sorry to inform you that the time period for ticket refunds has expired. You were supposed to send your tickets back twice with a 3 page typed letter explaining why you bought them in the first place, then call 14 days later and sing the national anthems of both fighters before we would even consider refunding your money.

    We are very pleased that you enjoyed the chips and beer.
    What? No mud wressling either?
    WARNING! - The Surgeon General has determined that, time spent listening to music is not deducted from one's lifespan.

  14. #14
    cam
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    I think it would be boring anyways, seeing RGA and Flo going at it. How about, Hershon/Ed vs Lexmark.

    I'm going to get a beer and some chips.

  15. #15
    Suspended markw's Avatar
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    My choice for a matchup?

    Hershon v. Ed Gein. That ought to be a winner.

    But, then again, they have been playing with themselves in public for quite some time now.

  16. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by markw
    Hershon v. Ed Gein. That ought to be a winner.

    But, then again, they have been playing with themselves in public for quite some time now.
    Edward must have already won, haven't seen Hershon's name in a long time. He's probably burried in a shallow grave in the backyard.

  17. #17
    Class of the clown GMichael's Avatar
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    I think we may still have a chance to put on a good show here. Plenty of fights going on all over this board. We've got the classic RGA vs. Flo. Lex and JSE would make a good opening act. Color vs. no color. Poor vs. rich. New vs. old. Receivers vs. separates. Magical pixy snot vs. electrolyte & voodoo. And then there's the whole "our country is better than yours" thread(s) going on.

    Dean, can you dig up a good referee for us? We'll need ground rules too. What do you say?
    I'll book the hot babes & male strippers to alternate holding up the round cards. (anyone wanting to audition for this can contact me at 1-888-OU812)
    WARNING! - The Surgeon General has determined that, time spent listening to music is not deducted from one's lifespan.

  18. #18
    BooBs are elitist jerks shokhead's Avatar
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    Bet my country has done more bad things to people then yours.
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  19. #19
    Class of the clown GMichael's Avatar
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    Cool A side bet huh?

    Quote Originally Posted by shokhead
    Bet my country has done more bad things to people then yours.
    A side bet huh? OK, I'll give you 3 to 1 odds that your country is no worse than mine. I'll even add that my state is worse than yours.
    WARNING! - The Surgeon General has determined that, time spent listening to music is not deducted from one's lifespan.

  20. #20
    BooBs are elitist jerks shokhead's Avatar
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    OK,you win. LMAO
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  21. #21
    Forum Regular Florian's Avatar
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    Well you guys can wait quite a while for that.
    Lots of music but not enough time for it all

  22. #22
    Class of the clown GMichael's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Florian
    Well you guys can wait quite a while for that.
    Who's your agent? What kind of offer are you holding out for?

    All in good fun Flo. The lighter side...
    WARNING! - The Surgeon General has determined that, time spent listening to music is not deducted from one's lifespan.

  23. #23
    Forum Regular Florian's Avatar
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    I am my own Agent.

    In case you didnt know, i am priceless!

    -Flo
    Lots of music but not enough time for it all

  24. #24
    Class of the clown GMichael's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Florian
    I am my own Agent.

    In case you didnt know, i am priceless!

    -Flo
    Priceless? That means free right? No price!
    Come on, after the show we'll all go to RGA's place, listen to some tunes and then go Moose hunting.
    If nothing else, do it as an ambassador from Apogee.
    WARNING! - The Surgeon General has determined that, time spent listening to music is not deducted from one's lifespan.

  25. #25
    Forum Regular Florian's Avatar
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    I'd rather listen to old KLH speakers in a bar drinking away my frustration with a few Sex on the Beach drinks. ( my record is 16)
    Lots of music but not enough time for it all

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