This is just damn ridiculous...
Adam,
These are strange days we live in and even on the best of them I question my ability to persevere. And, today is right in line with that sentiment. I feel like Bob Haldeman when, at the height of the Watergate scandal, internal memos started circulating about the President's concern over birds flying into the White House portico windows and requesting some device of modern science to prevent the tragedy. I mean, could someone please focus on the real issues at hand,... please?
The issue, of course, is technology here at AudioReview. I just finished watching NBC Nightly News' report on the further dismantling of Physical Education in the school systems and the death of competition within the American lexicon. First, these fat lesbians go after dodgeball and now it's "tag" and touch football and even soccer that are ruled verboten. After overcoming the urge to hurl my laptop at the tele I immediately sat back down to compose one of my king-hell, farcical reports but, of course, I'm foiled at every the pass by the technological limitations of the vBulletin system.
Are these people crazy? Is it not enough that our children already suffer from a chronic level of obesity? Is it responsible to avoid each and every type of conflict resolution situation through avoidance? Are we adequately preparing American children for life by implying that life is fair and if everyone can't be equal an activity should be banned?
But I digress. This is about expressionism, Adam, High Art...I know you support that. What I need is some type of new and customizable font to signify the whiny, victimizing warble of the modern American educational administrator. It needs to be the visual equivalent of a genetic juxtaposition of Rosy O'Donnell and Ellen DeGeneres with ausperger's syndrome. Bring the IT guys in...if they need a working example, try playing videos of everything Edie McClurg did as Herb Tarlek's wife on "WKRP in Cincinnati"...with SVI in the room immediately upon being asked, "What's the greatest monitor speaker?'. That'll crack the nut.
I can't be expected to work under these conditions.
C'mon Adam, I'm counting on you as de facto Editor-In-Chief around here...let's create some clicks.
Thanks in advance for your cooperation and enthusiasm,
---sticks