Movies we DON'T want to see...

[Worf101]

Kam's response to a thread of mine was pretty funny in that it contained some fictitious movies I'd pay money NOT to see. So, since it never bothered me to steal someone else's great Idea's I decided to start this thread. Here's some flicks I hope they nevah make.

1. "Titanic 2 Electric Boogaloo" - Locker, poppers and assorted breakdancers are transported back in time to the Titanic. They use their funky moves to bring a bit of smooth to the cruise. Finale of folks doing a "Soul Train" line to the life boats is Oscar worthy and priceless.

2. "Terminator 15 Rise of the Enemas" - While still using CGI to pump up his steroid ravaged body Ahnold the Governaotr chases John Conner through the nursing home with his cyborgic wheel chair. Cutting edge special effects manage make Ahnold into an almost passable actor.

3. :"Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Alcatraz" - Poor Harry realizes the hard way that even magic can't save you from an over amourous cell mate. See Harry sold for cigarettes. Watch his slender, fine English body covered in prison tats and cigarette burns. Witness Harry's transformation from simpering English fey into tough, hardened, shiv weilding member of a jailhouse gang. .

4. "Home Alone 4" - See what sexy fun a grown Culkin can get into when the family's away for the holidays. Co-stars Paris Hilton and Jessica Simpson help young Culkin partay the night away. Rated NC-17.

5. 'Finding Charlie" - Pixar and Disney team up one last time to hunt for former TV pitchman Charlie the Tuna. Long missing since the '80's and persumed the victim of a mob hit for outstanding gambling debts, Charlie is hunted by Dora and friends as she seeks back child support from the missing tuna.

Well, that's all of I can think of right now... chime in guys/gals this is fun.

Da Worfster

[kexodusc]

Damn, Worf...I'd pay good money to see Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Alcatraz,,,damn funny.
I usually give movies (that aren't sequels) the benefit of the doubt, and the opportunity to let me down...that being said, there is one in particular I'd hate to see:

"Full House - The Motion Picture"...nuff said.

[Kam]

Speed 3: how unlucky can one gal be? (see next selection) poor sandra bullock once again is stuck on a fast moving transportation device that carries a bomb on it, but you know what they say.... third times a charm!

Die Hard 4: This one, is actually being made. McClane, this time with daughter, (great buddy movie) yet again is caught up in a terrorist plot while yet again on holiday while yet again during christmas time (i think). Truth is stranger than fiction.

I Really Do Know That You Did Something About Four Summers Ago: And the strange thing is, it wouldn't be marketed as a comedy, but as the FINALE (until the next) installment of the jennifer love "trilogie" (said in french accent)!

Jaws 5: C'mon... you know they can squeeze another drop out of this franchise, and with the ridiculous number of shark movies that have been playing on SciFi, the audiences has been sufficiently teased. (side note: What the hey is up with all the ridiculous number of shark movies that have been playing on SciFi?)

Teeny Bopper Movie: Frustratingly trying to capture the fun of the hughes films from the 80's while never realizing the 80's time itself is what made those movies as much as anything else and cannot be replicated, but instead should make a teeny bopper movie that captures the fun of the current time frame (the good 'ol 00's) with the same fun respect that hughes did to his films. (mini-rant there, sorry).

peace
k2

[eqm]

Battlestar Gramatica:

The gramatica brothers (kickers in the nfl) in outer space winning the inter-planetary football game (ala space jam)

Dude, where's my Dell?:

The guy that got fired from the Dell commercials comes back...and now he can't find his computer! Watch as hijinks ensue as he wittily works his way to finding his PC in a box! Special appearance by John Stamos as Zoltan's older brother Xoltar!

Top 100 best or worst list, the movie!:

Watch D-list actors and comedians comment on things you used to think were cool! Four whole ours of *****ing! Do you like something in the year 2004? It will be made fun of in the 2008 edition!

[Worf101]

Damn, Worf...I'd pay good money to see Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Alcatraz,,,damn funny.
I usually give movies (that aren't sequels) the benefit of the doubt, and the opportunity to let me down...that being said, there is one in particular I'd hate to see:

"Full House - The Motion Picture"...nuff said.

"Full House" is bad. "Facts of Life" is Diabloical. And the winning hand in this trifecta,

"Different Strokes Part Deux:" If you're gonna go in the gutter Kex you got's to crawl all the way in.

Da Worfster

[Worf101]

Die Hard 4: This one, is actually being made. McClane, this time with daughter, (great buddy movie) yet again is caught up in a terrorist plot while yet again on holiday while yet again during christmas time (i think). Truth is stranger than fiction.

peace
k2

You're kiddin' right? No you're not.... arrrgh.. please pass the hemlock before I dies. I wonder was bad, Donalt Trump lookin' wig ole Brucie will pull out for this installment or will he go baldie?

Da wondering Worfster

[jamison]

Backdraft 2 the second wind! otherwise known as WHO FARTED!
the first one was great but please dont make a second one

[kexodusc]

Okay, I came up with 3 bad sequels...

How's about:

1)You got Served 2 Fast and Furiously 3: Combining the two most recognizeable franchises in movie history, Vin Diesel is back racing a stupid f'n Honda Civic, and gets into an accident just before the finish line of some boring drag race with some scrawny little white "street" kid from Connecticut. To settle the feud, Vin gets challenged to a "dance-off"...and we "suckas are about to get served" a load...again"

2)"Over the Top 2" Sly Stallone is back as "Lincoln Hawk" (damn cool name). This time, his kid' s even older, and to pay for his college tuition and make payments on his big-rig, Lincoln is forced to, yup, you guessed it - armwrestle Mad Dog Madison yet again in this classic rematch of epic proportions.

3) "Whore 2" (or 3 if, God forbid, there was a 2) - This had to be one of the worst movies I've ever seen...and I was a horny teenager at the time. The sequel will star some other MILF (Madonna) and probably James Spader (he seems to find his way into these movies)...Plot? We didn't need one the first go around...this gal sells herself by name alone.

[Sir Terrence the Terrible]

Hair Wars: Attack of the killer domes

This sci fi epic begins in a futuristic country club "Hair Club for men" were our hero Dark Baldy is undergoing a major hair implantation. However something goes badly wrong after surgery. Our hero implantation only takes on the left side of his head, as it is discovered he has a rare contagious disease that when you come in contact with him, your hair falls out. . He is so enraged by this, that he turns to the dark side. Now becoming the anti hero he creates a large army of followers by touching hundreds of thousand of men, and all of their hair falls out too. Backed by his loyal domed followers, Dark Baldy sets out to infect the entire solar system and turn everyone into a dome clone. Watch our anti hero as he sweeps through every planet in the solar system leading to the giant battle with the surfers and hippies. This movie promises to be a hair wrenching event

This movie opens at a barbershop near you!

The Hamshank redemption.

This is a story of a butchered pig that rises from the dead to go on a mad killing spree. Watch as the pig butchers the butcher(payback!) tortures the farmer that raised him by making him eat non stop for 4 days, kills a spider named Charlotte for telling him corny, really sappy stories as he grew up. This is a must see!

[Worf101]

Battlestar Gramatica:

The gramatica brothers (kickers in the nfl) in outer space winning the inter-planetary football game (ala space jam)

Dude, where's my Dell?:

The guy that got fired from the Dell commercials comes back...and now he can't find his computer! Watch as hijinks ensue as he wittily works his way to finding his PC in a box! Special appearance by John Stamos as Zoltan's older brother Xoltar!

Top 100 best or worst list, the movie!:

Watch D-list actors and comedians comment on things you used to think were cool! Four whole ours of *****ing! Do you like something in the year 2004? It will be made fun of in the 2008 edition!

Dem was some goodies... I think you got the idea right on the head... "Dude Where's my Dell" still has me chucklin'. The Grammatica's LOL, they'd sign up in a moment to do that and it might actually be funny...

Da Worfster

[Worf101]

Hair Wars: Attack of the killer domes

This sci fi epic begins in a futuristic country club "Hair Club for men" were our hero Dark Baldy is undergoing a major hair implantation. However something goes badly wrong after surgery. Our hero implantation only takes on the left side of his head, as it is discovered he has a rare contagious disease that when you come in contact with him, your hair falls out. . He is so enraged by this, that he turns to the dark side. Now becoming the anti hero he creates a large army of followers by touching hundreds of thousand of men, and all of their hair falls out too. Backed by his loyal domed followers, Dark Baldy sets out to infect the entire solar system and turn everyone into a dome clone. Watch our anti hero as he sweeps through every planet in the solar system leading to the giant battle with the surfers and hippies. This movie promises to be a hair wrenching event

This movie opens at a barbershop near you!

The Hamshank redemption.

This is a story of a butchered pig that rises from the dead to go on a mad killing spree. Watch as the pig butchers the butcher(payback!) tortures the farmer that raised him by making him eat non stop for 4 days, kills a spider named Charlotte for telling him corny, really sappy stories as he grew up. This is a must see!

Sir TtT you one crack smokin' fool. I love it... LOL... ROTFLMBBAO. I'm forwardin' that one to a friend of mine he's federal judge... snarf... wheeze... I'm dyin.

Da Worfster

[eisforelectronic]

"Full House" is bad. "Facts of Life" is Diabloical. And the winning hand in this trifecta,

"Different Strokes Part Deux:" If you're gonna go in the gutter Kex you got's to crawl all the way in.

Da Worfster

Watcha talkin bout Willis?