I need some good jokes and here's one for you...

What's the hardest part about rollerblading for guys? Telling your dad you're gay. :D

Ok, it's your turn.

Swish

What's the difference between a golfer and a parachutist?

Golfer: *THWAK*......."SH!T!"

Parachutist: "SH!T!"..........*THWAK*

THE WORLD'S "THINNEST" BOOKS:

> > STAYING HAPPILY MARRIED by Elizabeth Taylor
> >
> > BEAUTY SECRETS by Janet Reno
> >
> > HOME BUILT AIRPLANES by John Denver
> >
> > DOWN HILL SKIING by Sonny Bono
> >
> > HOW TO GET TO THE SUPER BOWL by Dan Marino
> >
> > FLYING AT NIGHT by JFK, JR.
> >
> > THINGS I LOVE ABOUT BILL by Hillary Clinton
> >
> > THINGS I CAN'T AFFORD by Bill Gates
> >
> > MY PLAN TO FIND THE REAL KILLERS by O.J. Simpson
> >
> > THINGS I WOULD NOT DO FOR MONEY by Dennis Rodman
> >
> > THE WILD YEARS by Al Gore
> >
> > AMELIA EARHART'S GUIDE TO THE PACIFIC OCEAN
> >
> > AMERICA'S MOST POPULAR LAWYERS
> >
> > DETROIT - A TRAVEL GUIDE
> >
> > DR. KEVORKIAN'S COLLECTION OF MOTIVATIONAL SPEECHES
> >
> > EVERYTHING MEN KNOW ABOUT WOMEN
> >
> > EVERYTHING WOMEN KNOW ABOUT MEN
> >
> > ALL THE MEN I'VE LOVED BEFORE by Ellen DeGeneres

ha ha hah you guys crack me up.
______________________________________________

What's old, wrinkled, and smells like Ginger?

Fred Astair's face!

Bumper stickers

I wouldn't be caught dead with a necrophiliac.

Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now.

Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.

I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.

Where there's a will, I want to be in it.

Okay, who put a "stop payment" on my reality check?

We have enough youth, how about a fountain of SMART

Why do men die before women?
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<img src=http://members.mailaka.net/davey/mendie1.jpg><img src=http://members.mailaka.net/davey/mendie2.jpg>
<img src=http://members.mailaka.net/davey/mendie3.jpg><img src=http://members.mailaka.net/davey/mendie4.jpg>

http://www.5ives.com/

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Troy

http://www.5ives.com/

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Five terrible fake names for an aging bluesman


Blind “Blindie” McBlindieblind

Ohhh, too fookin' funny. Thanks fer da laffs.

fp

they would whistle all the way down!

A man who worked for the fire department came home from work one day and told his wife, "you know, we have a wonderful system at the firehouse

Bell #1 rings and we all put our jackets on.

Bell #2 rings and we all slide down the pole

Bell #3 rings and we are on the truck and ready to go! From now on, we're going to run this house the same way."

When I say Bell #1, I want you to strip naked.....When I say Bell #2, I want you to jump into bed and when I say Bell #3, we're going to screw all night!"

The next night he came home from work and yelled
"Bell #1".The wife took off all her clothes. Bell #2. The wife jumped into
bed. Bell #3 They began screwing.

After two minutes, the wife yelled "Bell #4"

The husband asked "What the hell is this Bell #4?"

"MORE HOSE" she replied, "YOU'RE NOWHERE NEAR THE FIRE!"

:o





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