I didn't want to hijack JMs party thread...

Chorus:
Then its moose, moose, I want a moose.
I have never had anything quite like a moose.
I've had many women, my morals are loose,
But I've never had anything quite like a moose.
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When I was a young lad I used to like girls,
I played with their bodies and fondled their curls.
Till my girl ran off with a Captain named Bruce.
Oh you'll never get treated like that by a moose!

Chorus

When I'm in the mood for a good lay,
I go to the closet and get me some hay.
I open the window and spread it around,
Cause the moose always come when there's hay on the ground!

Chorus

I've done it with all sorts of beasties with hair;
I'd do it with snakes if their fangs were not there,
I've done it with llamas, sheep, dogs and a goose,
But I've never had anything quite like a moose!

Chorus

Now a gorilla is all right for a Saturday night,
And lions and tigers they put up a fight.
But it's just not the same when you slam their caboose
Like the feeling you get when you're humping a moose.

Chorus

The king of the gods is a fellow named Zeus,
On top of Olympus with an urge to seduce.
They offered him virgins but he'd just refuse,
"Screw all of your virgins and bring me a moose!"

Chorus

And now I am old and advanced in my years.
As I look o'er my life, I will shed me no tears.
So I sit in my chair with a glass of prune juice,
Playing hide the salami with Marvin the Moose!

Chorus

I've died, gone to heaven, my soul soars away
I show up at those gates with my bale of hay
Now they're bound to inquire as to my grin
And I'll wind up in hell humpin' mooses again



Additional verses here.