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  1. #1
    Sgt. At Arms Worf101's Avatar
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    Nov 2003
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    Troy, New York
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    The Gospel of "Git "er Done!"

    Scary when we get proverbs from Larry the cable guy
    and we canít argue with them.
    These are so obvious, why didnít I think of them first???

    Larry's Proverbs

    1. A day without sunshine is like night.

    2. On the other hand, you have different fingers.

    3. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.

    4. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

    5. Remember, half the people you know are below average.

    6. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

    7. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

    8. The early bird may get the worm,
    but the second mouse gets the cheese in the trap.

    9. Support bacteria.
    They're the only culture most people have.

    10. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

    11. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.

    12. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.

    13. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis?
    Raise my hand.

    14. OK, so what's the speed of dark?

    15. When everything is coming your way,
    you're in the wrong lane.

    16. Hard work pays off in the future.
    Laziness pays off now.

    17. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?

    18. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

    19. What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?

    20. Why do psychics have to ask you your name?

    21. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering,
    'What the heck happened?'

    22. Just remember -- if the world didn't suck,
    we would all fall off.

    23. Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people
    appear bright until you hear them speak.

    24. Life isn't like a box of chocolates.
    It's more like a jar of jalapenos.
    What you do today, might burn your butt tomorrow.

    Worf

  2. #2
    Class of the clown GMichael's Avatar
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    Put me down for a number 21 please.
    WARNING! - The Surgeon General has determined that, time spent listening to music is not deducted from one's lifespan.

  3. #3
    Shostakovich fan Feanor's Avatar
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    Just great!

    Thanks, Worfster.

  4. #4
    Man of the People Forums Moderator bobsticks's Avatar
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    Scary indeed though several of these were clever...it must be the delivery that turns me off so much.

    I liked the beatdown Larry got from our dear, departed Greg Giraldo...(sorta, kinda okay but not really safe for conservative workplaces)

    So, I broke into the palace
    With a sponge and a rusty spanner
    She said : "Eh, I know you, and you cannot sing"
    I said : "That's nothing - you should hear me play piano"

  5. #5
    Musicaholic Forums Moderator ForeverAutumn's Avatar
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    Jan 2003
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    Oh, I'm gonna steal some of those for FB status's. Yes I am.

    13 made me LOL.

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