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  1. #1
    Sure, sure... Auricauricle's Avatar
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    Twas a Night in December...

    ‘Twas a night in December, much like the rest
    The amplifier was howling, as I decided to test
    The transformers’ capacity to drive and to strain
    For that is the duty that befalls an audiophile’s brain.

    So I took out my discs, of the Beethoven and Bach
    And classics like Pink Floyd and Burt Bacharach
    I then found my perch, where I remained ensconced
    And settled there with my whisky, oblivious and entranced.

    When all of a sudden, there was much hue and cry
    I looked toward the porch, and there my wife did descry
    “What’s all this noise,” she shrieked, with temples a’throbbing
    “’Tis some album,” I murmured as the whisky burned through my noggin.

    As I closed my eyes again, I replayed a track
    --Memory fades whether it was Berlioz or Offenbach—
    In any case, in no time at all, the speakers did wail
    And my lady, ever obliging, slipped beside me with a stein of wassail.

    Now capacitors, don't fry
    Now transistors, don't fail me!
    On, resistors, don’t you dare singe!
    On, on, on to two hundred and three!
    To the topmost limit!
    Come on, give it some more!
    I know that you’ve got the juice!
    Come on, there’s much, much more in store!

    When all of a sudden there was a sputter and hiss,
    Oh, chit! I exclaimed, jumping up in a huff and p___d,
    “What was that,” cried my lady with alarm in her eye
    “”Tis the tweeters! They’re saying, ‘Enough is enough!”” I yelled with a cry.

    And then, in a moment, the room was quiet as the tomb
    The only sound heard now was my heart pounding like a kettle drum in the room
    I groaned inside and aloud as I watched as the smoke to the ceiling did rise
    And so my wife and I sat amazed and aghast as tears filled our eyes.

    The domes—how they hummed! How they joyfully sang!
    The woofers and midranges, how those behemoths rang!
    Those fuses, so magical and lively, were now blown to bits!
    I thought that without any tunes, I’d soon lose my wits!
    But then came a sound, as if from a place unseen and hidden
    It was the trees around the house that spoke now, unbidden
    As we listened with our ears and hearts open
    We heard for the first time, the song of the wood—much better than Copeland!
    And as the glorious sound enveloped our home
    We realized then, nature’s own music in wood, brook and stone!

    With this wish, I wish you all well and good health
    Good tidings to all, now and forever to your family great wealth
    Just remember, you audiophiles, who fall seduced by high fidelity's decadent sin:
    There may be trouble if you push your boxes to five thousand and ten!

    --Aa
    Last edited by Auricauricle; 12-05-2008 at 06:32 AM.
    "The great tragedy of science--the slaying of a beautiful hypothesis by an ugly fact."--T. Huxley

  2. #2
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    Hmmm... I think our psych nurse needs his head examined.

  3. #3
    Forum Regular audio amateur's Avatar
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    't was a very enjoyable piece of poetry.

    Quote Originally Posted by Auricauricle
    ‘Twas a night in December, much like the rest
    The amplifier was howling, as I decided to test
    The transformers’ capacity to drive and to strain
    For that is the duty that befalls an audiophile’s brain.

    ....

    --Aa
    No doubt you need your head examined though
    (On a side note, I do hope this is mostly fiction)

  4. #4
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    While shepherds washed their socks by night, all seated round the tub,
    A bar of Sunlight soap came down, and they began to scrub.

    no?

    sorry!
    All we are saying, is give peas a chance.

  5. #5
    Audio/HT Nut version 1.3a
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    Without a doubt, the odds-on favorite for this years Poet Laureate!

    Happy Holidays to all the nuthouse nurses of the planet and their patron saint shown below.

    RR6
    Attached Images Attached Images  

  6. #6
    Sure, sure... Auricauricle's Avatar
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    Ah, Roady, ya know how to soften mah heart!

    (Gakkkk!!!!)

  7. #7
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    Meh... Is that all you got to say?

  8. #8
    Sure, sure... Auricauricle's Avatar
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    Sumpin' wrong with that, Tex?

  9. #9
    Class of the clown GMichael's Avatar
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    A few points.

    1st) Very nice job. I found it to be full of fun and intelligent quips.
    2nd) Somebody must have a little too much time on their hands.
    3rd) If a van pulls up and several guys with white trench coats step out, don't run. They are there to help you get better. Go with them.
    4th) Say hi to all my old friends when you get there.
    WARNING! - The Surgeon General has determined that, time spent listening to music is not deducted from one's lifespan.

  10. #10
    Sure, sure... Auricauricle's Avatar
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    I spread da woid, Pops....Dey tell me dey have med alterations fer yer jacket an' wanna youse t'come over fer a fittin'....

    Too much time on me hands? Now whay would you say a foll thing like that, I wunner?

  11. #11
    Class of the clown GMichael's Avatar
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    New meds?
    4me?

    2cool.
    WARNING! - The Surgeon General has determined that, time spent listening to music is not deducted from one's lifespan.

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Auricauricle
    Sumpin' wrong with that, Tex?
    That post is a week old and I no longer recall its purpose. K?

  13. #13
    Sgt. At Arms Worf101's Avatar
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    Hmm...

    "He say's he's a 'poet' but he sure doesn't show it."

    Cute man... pretty good iffin I says so myself.

    Da Worfster

  14. #14
    Class of the clown GMichael's Avatar
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    Give da man dime fo makin dat ryme.
    WARNING! - The Surgeon General has determined that, time spent listening to music is not deducted from one's lifespan.

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