Sexual Harassment

[JOEBIALEK]

Sexual harassment is a form of sex discrimination that violates Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964.
Unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, and other verbal or physical conduct of a sexual nature constitutes sexual harassment when submission to or rejection of this conduct explicitly or implicitly affects an individual's employment, unreasonably interferes with an individual's work performance or creates an intimidating, hostile or offensive work environment. Source: http://www.eeoc.gov/facts/fs-sex.html

For the first time in his 25 years of employment, a female employee has made a verbal allegation of sexual harassment against a male friend of mine. "John" was notified of this by his immediate supervisor via an email. The email did not indicate an incident or complaint but rather was framed in the context of "feedback" advising John to be carefull when it comes to dealing with female employees. It went on to say that comments, compliments, innuendos, flirting, wandering eyes, etc. can be misperceived and possibly jeapordize his job. Needless to say, John was absolutely astounded. He immediately approached his supervisor and demanded clarification. The supervisor indicated that a female employee had verbalized the allegation. He then clarified his position on the matter by stating that he has never witnessed any such behavior by John nor believes any incident occurred. What bothers John however, is why was the email sent in the first place? Does it constitute some form of written warning? The employee handbook states that standard operating procedure requires a verbal warning first and then written warning followed by a final written warning and then termination. Were John's civil rights violated?

The work environment today in the United States is becoming more and more polarized. Women are flagrantly disregarding company dress codes in order to flaunt there sexuality. It was interesting to discover how narrowly defined sexual harassment has become. A clause in the code mentions "visual harassment"; defined as any display that promotes the sexuality of what is depicted, or draws attention to the private parts of the body, even if there is partial clothing. Consequently, men are flagrantly disregarding verbal and visual inhibitions as they react to the sexual stimulus. The question that remains however, is which side constitutes criminality? Is it the sexual provocation or is it the sexual reaction? Do wandering male eyes encourage women to dress more provocatively or does female attire encourage wandering male eyes? Does a loose verbal atmosphere in the work place exacerbate the problem? Would clamping down constitute a violation of freedom of speech? What about the constant bombardment of sexual messages facilitated through various media? The 1960's ushered in the sexual revolution. Perhaps it is time for the counter revolution.

[Bryan]

If possible, I'd ask for a meeting between the boss, him, and her. Find out the specifics of what happened and try and put it in context. Of course, if either one of them is a member of a union they need to include the local union rep in on the meeting.

[FLZapped]

Sexual harassment is a form of sex discrimination that violates Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964.
Unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, and other verbal or physical conduct of a sexual nature constitutes sexual harassment when submission to or rejection of this conduct explicitly or implicitly affects an individual's employment, unreasonably interferes with an individual's work performance or creates an intimidating, hostile or offensive work environment.

Yes, the email could constitute a written warning. If it wasn't intended as so, it is. This email will remain in the company's records forever and if something ever happened, could be retrieved through a court order. Erasing it from your machine, or your bosses machine won't help. A copy is on the email server.

Luckily, it doesn't appear as though it is being persued through HR. There is no winning. Once accused, you're guilty. HR will not be interested in the truth. They will circle thier wagons and go into the protect the interest of the company mode. If John looks further into it, he'll probably find this is one of those offenses that carries an immediate termination clause.

The law is EXTREMELY vague and since it is a he said/she said scenario, it always goes to the woman making the accusation.

This is an area you need to tread extremely lightly in. I would suggest that John make no further contact with this woman, if he has any idea who it is. ESPECIALLY away from work. Yes, away from work too. This extends into your private life.

And John can forget having any civil rights in this matter.

-Bruce

[Bryan]

Here is where it would depend upon company policy for the email server. Some places save everything back to day one. Other places only save 30 days or so. Either way, this is a no-win situation for someone alleging the harrasement is almost as good as it being fact rather than an allegation with no basis in the truth or in fact.

[JSE]

I can't comment on your friend's situation but I have always found that if you act like a gentleman and a professional at work, there's nothing to worry about. Simple as that.


Also, some women in my office have worn some pretty "revealing" outfits in the past. People, male and female are going to look. It's our nature. It's how long we look and "How" we look that get's people into trouble. Eyes popping out of our heads and tongues dragging tends to get more attention than the outfit in question.

JSE

[RGA]

The Boss is covering his ass in this situation.

My dad worked for the Federal government of Canada. A female employee who actually WAS verbally harrassed by her immediate supervisor made the complaint to the department head who wwas the department head for 25 years. This person didn't do anything about the complaint just kinda of syaing it's no big deal etc. Well the woman's supervisor was fired as was the department head for not acting upon the complaint.

In your friend's case the supervisor has sent a warning via e-mail - no doubt the supervisor will keep his e-mail on file so if someone comes saying he didn't do anything he can say he warned "John" of the complaint - even if he thinks the woman in question is an anal ***** he has to protect himself.

Reason #49 not to be a supervisor unless it pays enough to retire 15 years early so you can recovr from the added stress and no friends.

[jack70]

I can't comment on your friend's situation but I have always found that if you act like a gentleman and a professional at work, there's nothing to worry about. Simple as that. That may generally be true. Ah, but if life was so pure and simple. You're either very young, naive, uninformed, or blissfully lucky. (maybe all 4). I'm sure you also believe that if you obey all the traffic laws you'll never have an accident or get killed. (because innocent people never get injured).

Over the past few decades, the workplace has added a lot more women, especially in certain all-male type jobs. I've personally seen many such horror stories that went way beyond what even the "intent" (whatever that is) of what some ditsy women "imagined". I've read about many others too. Some people get "offended" by the most innocuous things, often imagined. Some even think they have a "right" to silence others because of their warped view of the law. I'm not talking about true "harassment," which has strick legal elements including intent, but going overboard into a quasi-Orwellian speech/thought police. If you read the law, it's lacking in many specifics of the type in say, criminal law, which often leaves the accussed at a real legal disadvantage. The original (good) intent of such laws has often devolved into Kafka-like results that poison normal interaction. All it takes is one idiot, and a boss without common sense or backbone. It certainly helps if your co-workers are stand-up people who'll speak up, vouch for you, and deliver real justice.

I've seen guys who fawn all over women employees, putting their hands on them etc, and nothing is ever said. Another might once in a blue-moon utter a swear word out of earshot of a woman, yet get reprimanded for it. 99% of women can be cool, but all it takes is one moron, who can now get the full weight of the legal system (government) to come after you. The scary thing here is that it doesn't matter if the charges are true, it's the charge that becomes the issue. Ever try to prove a negative?... that's why these laws CAN BE so corrosive. They don't need a video tape or dozens of witnesses, just a bunch of silly "official" complaints.

The problem is the company & government bureaucracy is likely to take sides with the moron, regardless of the merits of the case. You tend to find milktoast spineless people in those positions (supervision & legal depts), instead of truth-seekers and people of solid character & leadership. They too often acquiesce to the easiest way out, simply to avoid being pulled into a legal suit themselves... so they tend to side with the complaintent, or at least not try to solve the issue or get to the truth of the matter, simply to protect their own asses (getting fired) & any future court proceedings (fines). It could be a misunderstanding, an accident, a boorish loudmouth employee, or... it could be a ditsy, insecure, nut-case employee. If you think they (ditsy, insecure, nut-cases) don't exist, I've got a bridge to sell you. LOL. Half the population is below average (by definition)... in the lower end of that half, there are some real winners.

[JSE]

That may generally be true. Ah, but if life was so pure and simple. You're either very young, naive, uninformed, or blissfully lucky. (maybe all 4). I'm sure you also believe that if you obey all the traffic laws you'll never have an accident or get killed. (because innocent people never get injured).


Nope, none of the above. And, I hardly obey the speed limit. I look at the speed limit as more of a suggestion. I used to deal with accidents daily so I know it can happen anytime, anywhere and to anyone.

Anyway, there will always be those few fanatic coworkers that will make anything into a federal case. There's no way to get away from that. But all I am saying is that if you act professional and like a gentleman, 99.99% of the time you will be fine. I don't worry about it. If someone is going to falsely accuse me of something the best defense is to have my fellow coworkers as character witnesses and support me. There is really no way to avoid people that make false allegations. They just pick the weakest target. I can assure you that I am not a weak target.

JSE

[FLZapped]

They just pick the weakest target. I can assure you that I am not a weak target.

JSE

Doesn't matter, the system is heavily weighed against you in it's vagueness and lack of proving the voracity of the claim made.

-Bruce

[jack70]

I don't worry about it. If someone is going to falsely accuse me of something the best defense is to have my fellow coworkers as character witnesses and support me. There is really no way to avoid people that make false allegations. They just pick the weakest target. I can assure you that I am not a weak target.Well, I hope that such cases at least trouble you, even if you feel safe from it yourself. I agree with your basic mindset and attitude, and frankly feel the same way ("...go ahead & sue me, I'll see you in court loser!"). And certainly some jobs/work environments are a lot different in these matters. But the way the legal system now works (closer to an extortion racket than a search for truth & justice), all it takes is one disgruntled employee, one mentally unbalanced nut-job, or someone who wants to strategically "move you outta their way" for corporate advancement. Not that they would necessarily PREVAIL if you did go to court... but you could still end up losing big $ money defending yourself, and the company might get rid of you simply to insulate themselves.

There was a very sharp young woman on TV the other night who worked in the hi-finance/securities market in NYC (I think). She'd returned a blouse or something to a store and they accused her of fraud and called the police who arrested her. Turns out she'd originally paid via credit card, so she had proof she was in the right. But she was fired after being arrested anyway... that was a year ago. And that's the kind of things that often domino in such cases. One moment you're minding your own business, then Wham, you're forced to defend yourself from a system that treats falsely accused victims the same as criminals. There are certain laws in my state where the government is required to go through certain legal hoops if a parent is accused of molesting or injuring their kids. Even if such a false allegation by some fruitcake was found to be without merit, how do you get your reputation back after everyone's seen you in the paper being arrested? We've become SO over-eager to protect and "make life fair", we've taken rights AWAY from innocent "alleged" victims in certain "crimes". Like this kinda thing.

There's little incentive these days for some whack job NOT pull a "harassment suit" (even if you counter-sue, and win, you can't get from blood a stone). And there's a LOT of incentive for a company to fire someone quickly, regardless of the truth, and settle (extort), rather than pay lawyers, higher insurance premiums, and possibly lose additionally (deep pockets) down the road to a jury of loons. Ironically unions often give the best protection in these cases. But I HAVE seen good people screwed over for the most insane allegations. Simply "being innocent" isn't the key thing... anymore than "driving responsibly" is the key to staying safe on the roads.

[JSE]

Doesn't matter, the system is heavily weighed against you in it's vagueness and lack of proving the voracity of the claim made.

-Bruce

I'm not saying I can't be sued or accused. I'm just saying that I am a unlikely target compared to many others in my current company. Predators pray on the weak. Or in this case, the ones who walk a thin line between appropriate and inappropriate behavior. I am nowhere near that line in my work environment.

You and Jack are right in regard to the system being stacked against the accused. I understand that. That's why I don't give any hint of inappropriate behavior at work. Now in my social life? That's another story! LOL.

JSE

[karl k]

I'm not saying I can't be sued or accused. I'm just saying that I am a unlikely target compared to many others in my current company. Predators pray on the weak. Or in this case, the ones who walk a thin line between appropriate and inappropriate behavior. I am nowhere near that line in my work environment.

You and Jack are right in regard to the system being stacked against the accused. I understand that. That's why I don't give any hint of inappropriate behavior at work. Now in my social life? That's another story! LOL.

JSE
yourself as small a target as possible, but if you think doing so is the only thing you can do, you will be subject to problems eventually. Those who only "drive responsibly" will also be seen as an easy target... or should I say a "helpless" target. In short... weak. In addition to minding myself, I choose to consider myself a target for anything and everything. Some think that position is a little over the top, maybe even a little paranoid, but if you go looking for potential trouble that is looking for a victim, you will better be able to react to or avoid the trouble in time before the damage sets in. On the road, that's called "defensive driving". Not saying that being a gentleman is futile, just saying that that alone isn't enough for me to be comfortable. It doesn't require that you watch even more of what you say(that's already getting out of hand), just that you maybe watch WHO you say things to instead. I would even go so far as to say that limited or no conversation with the opposite sex is preferable if possible. I do so just to head off any possible advances by others that might get me into trouble with the wife(however unlikely that may ocurr :) ) but the same applies to harrassment.

Overall, I would agree with what has been said and hope that we as men can avoid such things with the tactics we employ. When we can learn to have a little fun without being accused of harrassment, we will have experienced "safe sex". :D