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Worf101
06-12-2010, 11:24 AM
A few days after Christmas, a mother was working in the kitchen listening to her young son playing with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the train stop and her son said, "All of you sons of *****es who want off, get the hell off now, cause this is the last stop! And all of you sons of *****es who are getting on, get your asses in the train, cause we're going down the tracks."

The mother went nuts and told her son, "We don't use that kind of language in this house. Now I want you to go to your room and you are to stay there for TWO HOURS. When you come out, you may play with your train, but I want you to use nice language."

Two hours later, the son comes out of the bedroom and resumes playing with his train. Soon the train stopped and the mother heard her son say, "All passengers who are disembarking from the train, please remember to take all of your belongings with you. We thank you for riding with us today and hope your trip was a pleasant one. We hope you will ride with us again soon." She hears the little boy continue, "For those of you just boarding, we ask you to stow all of your hand luggage under your seat. Remember, there is no smoking on the train. We hope you will have a pleasant and relaxing journey with us today."

As the mother began to smile, the child added, "For those of you who are pissed off about the TWO HOUR delay, please see the ***** in the kitchen."

I'm ready for my ban now..


Worf

ForeverAutumn
06-12-2010, 11:48 AM
That is one of the funniest jokes that I've heard in a long time! Thanks for the chuckle Worf!!

bobsticks
06-12-2010, 12:13 PM
Ban?!

I just gave ya a Greenie...

Dereklee
07-11-2010, 10:43 PM
ooh, that's really funny,haha. thanks for sharing, worlf

kexodusc
07-12-2010, 03:14 AM
Worfster does it again! Thankfully I had my coffee bib on this time.

Auricauricle
07-12-2010, 08:04 AM
Thanks so much, Sir Slope! Got any paper towels for my, now wet, keyboard?

Worf101
07-13-2010, 04:46 AM
Thanks for the love folks, litterally.

Worf

luvtolisten
07-19-2010, 06:27 AM
Harold and Betty happen to meet by chance at a park bench. They were both in their late nineties. Both their spouses had passed away, years before and both had been celibate since.
Both were in relatively good shape, although Harold was a little hard of hearing. Anyway they both hit it off, after talking for a few hours, they both came to their final wish. They both decided they would like to have sex one last time.They pooled their money together and rented a room. Betty started to undress first. She took off her top, paused a moment, put her hand to her chest and said to Harold, "excuse me, but I have acute angina". Harold said "Whaaaat??". Betty again said, only louder 'I a have acute angina". Harold Yells back "I hope so because those t#ts are TERRIBLE!!"

Worf101
07-19-2010, 09:24 AM
Harold and Betty happen to meet by chance at a park bench. They were both in their late nineties. Both their spouses had passed away, years before and both had been celibate since.
Both were in relatively good shape, although Harold was a little hard of hearing. Anyway they both hit it off, after talking for a few hours, they both came to their final wish. They both decided they would like to have sex one last time.They pooled their money together and rented a room. Betty started to undress first. She took off her top, paused a moment, put her hand to her chest and said to Harold, "excuse me, but I have acute angina". Harold said "Whaaaat??". Betty again said, only louder 'I a have acute angina". Harold Yells back "I hope so because those t#ts are TERRIBLE!!"
That was turrible, jest turrible, but FUNNEEEEE!!!!!

Worf

Auricauricle
07-19-2010, 04:56 PM
Excellllllllllllent, Luvtolisten!!!!!

No doubt you heard about the little old lady who wanted to shoot herself in the heart...

She blew her kneecap off.

luvtolisten
07-19-2010, 05:44 PM
:thumbsup: Thanks fellas! Not bad yourself Aurc!
One more, stolen from the ManShow:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R9ETlTZoF1E&feature=related