Miami Vice--Why??!! [Archive] - Audio & Video Forums

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bobsticks
12-10-2006, 05:35 PM
Um, okay, I know there's a level of personal responsibility involved in everything and I am the one that made the decision to devote two hours of my life to this, but still I must scream foul. It's hard to put into words how much this movie sucked. Suffice it to say that the overall slide in the quality of movies that has been much lamented around here continues with this one. Just godawful,really.

I liked Miami Vice when it was on television. I mean, I was a kid and it was flashy and hip and sometimes funny. Nothing that was good about the show transfers over to the movie.

First and foremost the script is horrible. Jamie Fox, who I regard as a pretty solid actor, has nothing to say that sounds even remotely intelligent. Any attempt at acting on his part must surely have been undercut by the choppy and vague storyline. Colin Farrell sounds like a pro-wrestler with tourette's syndrome. Justin Theroux, one of tinsel town's best character-actors, is credited for appearing in this--and I think I saw him once--but doesn't even have any dialogue.

The cinematography is acceptable in that "its Michael Mann/Collateral sort of way". It could be argued that this was a "modern" take on the show. It could also be argued that it sucked. Frankly, this seemed like a rushed project compared to Collateral.

I wish I could comment on the sound, but I was too busy yelling at the screen to notice. My guess is that it was fairly unremarkable as nothing grabbed me.

Much like the Bourne Identity, Miami Vice is really a marketing vehicle. Other than using a known commodity to enhance name-recognition there was no reason to make this a Miami Vice film. The characters in no way resembled any of the original characters and could just as easily been attributed to any action/adventure vehicle. Replace Farrell with any African-American male and you could have had Bad Boys 3: The Unfunny Years.

Unlike The Bourne Identity you don't have a decent movie that could stand on it's own outside the franchise name.

Honestly, I've already devoted too much of life to this film. Learn from my mistakes. Go on without me...and avoid at all costs.

emorphien
12-10-2006, 10:14 PM
yes, it was absolutely terrible

Dusty Chalk
12-11-2006, 03:24 AM
The reason (http://www.bbspot.com/News/2005/03/mpaa_piracy.html).

(This is going to be answer to about 50% of these kinds of threads from now on.)

basite
12-11-2006, 08:07 AM
saw it yesterday, at first, the colors looked weird, but that could be just me, and sometimes, there were some fancy special effects like the explosion of that trailer, and yes, the boats were nice too, but that's it, the story line was terrible, it was one big cliché, (i think they just have their standards there in hollywood, one storyline per genre), the actors didn't play well, and they looked terrible, the drugs boss' beard was oversized, farrel's mustache was a scaling error (it was HUGE), the japanese woman looked like she was hit by a bus, the only ones that actually looked right were the the racist drug buyers (the ones with the tatoos everywere) but then again, they probably didn't have their make-up on...
i can continue hours about this, (the car chase perhaps, were they have to stop that bentley)
however, i do want those cars and boats...

peace,
Basite

GMichael
12-11-2006, 10:00 AM
You aint seen nuthin yet. Here is a partial list of new movies coming out next summer.

Barney Miller strikes again
Welcome Back, Welcome Back Kotter
Cheers all night
Friends again
Flying high Nun (Also known as Sally strikes again)
Hawaii Five-Oh (Isn't this one a sequel?)
Hogan's Heroes meets Heroes
Gunsmoker
Lone Deranger
Have Gun Will Shoot
My Mother The Car Meets chitty chitty gang bang


Be sure to check your local theaters for start times.

SlumpBuster
12-11-2006, 10:16 AM
The characters in no way resembled any of the original characters and could just as easily been attributed to any action/adventure vehicle.

Yeah, call it Rocky 6. What happened to Rocky's brain injury? He could never fight again? Right? Where's Adrian wringing her hands over this debacle?


Unlike The Bourne Identity you don't have a decent movie that could stand on it's own outside the franchise name.

I actually made it through both Bourne movies without even knowing that they were based on a book or whatever. I only found out when reading about the third one coming out. Miami Vice was just another bad TV show made into a movie by a somewhat overrate director. Michael Mann can get away with a myriad of sins on the good will of Last of the Mohicans, as far as I'm concerned. But I already wasted two hours on Manhunter (ssslllloooooowwww), so thanks for the heads up on Miami Vice.

kexodusc
12-11-2006, 12:32 PM
Colin Farrell sounds like a pro-wrestler with tourette's syndrome.


This could very well be the Quote of the Year at ar.com!!! :D

bobsticks
12-12-2006, 05:39 AM
My Mother The Car Meets chitty chitty gang bang .

For the love of God, man, leave moms out of this.

...and Bernd says I'm bringing down the tone in here?!

basite
12-12-2006, 07:18 AM
You aint seen nuthin yet. Here is a partial list of new movies coming out next summer.
Be sure to check your local theaters for start times.

Oh Noes,
I'm sooooo happy most of that crap doesn't even make it here, however sometimes it does happen to get here, and then it somehow becomes a hit... :confused5:

anyways,

Keep them spinning
Basite.

GMichael
12-12-2006, 07:49 AM
For the love of God, man, leave moms out of this.

...and Bernd says I'm bringing down the tone in here?!

Mom still has some life left in her.